Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Christmas 2004

Ben's sleeping, so I thought I'd take the time to say Merry Christmas or Happy Hannukah (sp?) for my Jewish friend Malka (to whom I owe a present and some pictures of Ben--they are coming, I promise). None of my black friends celebrate Kwanzaa, but Happy Kwanzaa. The thing I like best about being a mom is that I get to show the world to a person who's never seen it before. You know how it's fun to watch a movie you've already seen with someone who's never seen it? It's like that, only a million times better.

Not that you care, but I've decided to wean Ben from the breast. It's too exhausting and I can't eat beans and I'm going back to work. Yesterday, I was trying to feed him formula, but he kept going for my breast, and it made me cry. I feel more guilty about this than anything I've ever done before, but I know it is best for me, which in turn is best for Ben. He won't remember any of this, but it is traumatic for me.

Christmas this year was great, but Ben was ambivalent towards Santa. He didn't like him, he didn't dislike him. I feel the same way.


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